I came home late that night. I was listening to some peppy song in my earphones to lighten up my mood. Work can get on my nerves at times. As I reached the door of my house, I removed my earphones while knocking on the door. When she, my wife, didn’t open the door, I called her on her cell phone. Still no answer. That’s strange I thought. She is a very light sleeper. She picks up her phone within few seconds even if she is sleeping. I tried knocking harder but nothing happened. Slightly confused and worried, I started searching for the house keys in my office bag. Luckily, I had one spare set in my bag.
I entered the house and it was eerily calm. So cold. So calm.
Placing my bag on the table, I started rummaging through the refrigerator while thinking about her. She always left a message for me if she had to go out somewhere urgently. After having a quick snack, I decided to call her again.
I heard her phone ringing.
Huh? Is she in the home?
I followed the sound of her ringtone and reached to the backyard where she was sitting with her back to the glass wall.
I went towards her and placed my hand on her shoulder. When she didn’t turn to face me, I moved in front of her. I saw her eyes closed. I called out her name but she didn’t open her eyes. My world shattered in that very moment. I checked her pulse and initially, I found none. Frantically checking again, I found her pulse, very weak, almost non-existent. I picked her up and took her inside the house. I called the ambulance. My body worked on autopilot. On reaching the hospital, I got to know it was an overdose, sleeping pill overdose. She slipped into a coma before I found her.
The love of my life decided to take her own life and I was unaware of it. I was unaware about her depression. I was unaware about her sleepless nights. She hid it all from me. She didn’t want me to worry about her so she hid it all but she decided to leave me all alone. Sinking down on the floor, I thought what had gone wrong.
My mistake started when I fell in love. My mistake wasn’t falling in love, but falling so hard that I missed the warning signs.
Her eyes, those dark brown orbs, always lacked something. I didn’t see it until it was too late. She was hiding something from me and I didn’t notice till it was too late to fix anything.
I love her unconditionally. I am letting her memories haunt me day and night while I wait for her to wake up from her deep sleep.The guilt of not seeing it all before is eating me up.
In this world full of insecurities, I am just another human being. I made many mistakes in the past. Some bigger than the others. I am trying to pick those pieces from the past which choke me with overwhelming pain and give me a sense of desperation. I am letting those pieces fit into the puzzle of my present and ruin whatever the future holds for me.
B.N. : Hello my lovely readers and fellow bloggers!
I hope you all are doing great.
After so so sooo long, I wrote a short story. Do share your review and thoughts in the comment section.